Not sure what you want to do? 5 questions to ask yourself honestly

If you’re reading this, someone (a parent, a teacher, a counsellor) has probably asked you THE question: « What do you want to do after school? » And you don’t have an answer. Or you have 12 answers. Or your answer changes every month. That’s normal. You’re 16, 17, 18. You’re not supposed to know.

This article won’t tell you which career to choose. It will ask you 5 concrete questions that will help you move forward, not towards a job title, but towards a direction. Because a direction is what you need, not a destination.

Before we start: stop feeling guilty

The pressure is real. Your parents worry. University applications ask you to choose. Your teachers ask about your subjects. And you feel bad because your best friend has « always known » she wants to do medicine.

Small secret: the majority of adults who have a fulfilling career at 35 didn’t know either at your age. They tried, stumbled, changed their mind, sometimes failed, and their path took shape by moving forward, not by planning everything at 17.

The goal of these 5 questions isn’t to find The Answer. It’s to reduce the fog enough to make a first coherent choice. You can always correct later.

Question 1: « What makes me lose track of time? »

Not « what do you like ». Not « what’s your hobby ». The question is more precise: which activity makes you lose track of time? When you’re so absorbed that hours fly by.

It could be:

• Solving a maths or physics problem
• Reading a novel or a long-form article
• Coding a small programme or tinkering with a website
• Drawing, painting, creating something visual
• Watching a documentary and wanting to know more
• Explaining something to someone (and seeing them understand)
• Organising an event, a trip, a project
• Debating an idea, arguing, persuading

What it tells you: the activity that makes you lose track of time is a flow indicator: a psychological state where you’re both focused and happy. The best orientations are those that allow you to experience this state as often as possible in your professional life.

What it doesn’t tell you: that you must make it your job. If you lose track of time playing Minecraft, it doesn’t mean you should become a game designer. But it might mean you enjoy building, organising, solving problems in a visual environment, and that’s transferable to many careers (architect, engineer, urban planner, UX designer…).

Question 2: « Do I prefer working alone or in a team? »

This is a question about how you function, not about competence. Some people are more effective and happier when they work alone, in quiet, at their own pace. Others need interaction, discussion, collective work to feel stimulated.

If you prefer working alone: research paths, writing careers (journalism, translation, analysis), highly specialised technical roles (developer, analyst, researcher) and university programmes will probably suit you better.

If you prefer working in a team: business schools, management programmes, social work, teaching, communications, law (arguing, negotiating) and work-study programmes will probably suit you better.

If it depends on the day: welcome to normality. Most interesting careers mix both. But your dominant preference is a good indicator of the environment where you’ll thrive.

Question 3: « Do I need structure or freedom? »

Be honest with yourself. Not what you wish you were, but what you actually are.

You need structure if:

• You work better when someone checks you’re progressing
• You struggle to organise yourself alone (procrastination, forgetting, last-minute rushes)
• You feel reassured when the timetable is fixed and predictable
• You need regular feedback to stay motivated

→ Programmes that offer structure: vocational courses (BTS, IUT in France), A-level colleges with strict timetables, structured university programmes with mandatory attendance, apprenticeships.

You need freedom if:

• You’re more effective when you decide your own schedule
• You enjoy diving deep into a subject on your own
• You can’t stand being told what to do and when
• You can work alone for hours without supervision

→ Programmes that offer freedom: university (especially humanities and social sciences), liberal arts colleges, self-directed learning environments. But warning: freedom without discipline leads to first-year failure.

The trap: many teenagers see themselves as « free spirits » because they don’t like school. But not liking school ≠ being autonomous at university. Autonomy means getting up at 7am without anyone telling you to, working 3 hours on an exercise nobody will check, and attending class even when nobody takes roll. If that doesn’t sound like you, structure will be better, and there’s no shame in that.

Question 4: « What do I genuinely hate? »

Sometimes it’s easier to reason by elimination than by aspiration. What do you already know you DON’T want?

• « I do NOT want to sit in front of a screen 8 hours a day » → eliminates most office jobs, IT, finance
• « I do NOT want to speak in front of people » → eliminates (for now) teaching, law, sales
• « I do NOT want to do maths » → eliminates pure science tracks, engineering, quantitative finance
• « I do NOT want to work indoors » → eliminates most office careers, points towards agriculture, construction, sport, environment
• « I do NOT want to be far from my family » → eliminates (for now) studying abroad or in a distant boarding school

What it tells you: each « no » reduces the field of possibilities, and that’s a good thing. A reduced but honest field is better than an infinite and paralysing one.

Warning: some « no’s » are disguised fears, not certainties. « I don’t want to speak in front of people » might be a surmountable shyness, not a permanent limit. Distinguish real no’s (« this makes me genuinely unhappy ») from false no’s (« I’m scared but I could try »).

Question 5: « Who do I want to be like? »

Not literally — not « I want to be Elon Musk ». Rather: are there adults around you whose professional daily life appeals to you? An uncle who talks about his work in a way that sounds exciting, a teacher whose job seems cool, a friend’s parent who does something you find interesting, a content creator whose path resonates with you.

What it tells you: concrete role models are infinitely more useful than abstract career descriptions on a website. If you admire the daily life of an ER doctor you know, that’s a more reliable signal than « I like science ». If you admire the freedom of an entrepreneur, that’s a more reliable signal than « I like money ».

Tip: if someone inspires you, go talk to them. Ask them to describe a typical day, what they love and don’t love about their job, and what they’d have done differently in their studies. 20 minutes of conversation is worth more than 3 hours on a careers website.

And now?

If you’ve answered the 5 questions honestly, you now have:

• A type of activity that puts you in flow (question 1)
• A preferred way of working — alone or in a team (question 2)
• A need for structure or freedom (question 3)
• A list of what you do NOT want (question 4)
• Maybe a concrete role model who inspires you (question 5)

That’s not a career. It’s a compass. And with this compass, you can start looking at programmes that match, not because they « pay well » or because your parents prefer them, but because they look like you.

The rest will come. Promise.

Key takeaways

• It’s normal not to know what you want to do. Most adults didn’t know either at your age.
• You don’t need a specific career, you need a direction.
• 5 concrete questions: flow, alone/team, structure/freedom, what you hate, who inspires you.
• Reasoning by elimination is often more effective than by aspiration.
• Talk to adults who do a job that seems interesting to you — 20 minutes of conversation beats 3 hours on a website.

Going further

• University, engineering school, business school: what really sets them apart
• Russell Group, Ivy League, classes préparatoires: what people confuse

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Article written by Catherine Menay, orientation counsellor at Axiom Orientation. Catherine has been supporting teenagers and families with their first orientation reflections for over fifteen years — including when the first answer is « I don’t know ».